We are LIVE from BCCW's "Respect the Shooters & Hookers"!!! Introducing the announce team for this evening...
MSD and Matt Striker
Cue event theme song and let's get right to the action!!!
1) "My Time Is Now"
The Broken City Slaughtahouse explodes into cheers. Hometown hero JOHN CENA makes his way to the ring, greened out with Celtics gear. Does a quick stand-up routine involving a Lakers jersey (with a Miami Heat punch line to draw a big pop).
Welcomes everyone to Broken City Championship Wrestling "RESPECT THE SHOOTERS & HOOKERS!!!" Feels he may have been a little disrespectful at the last Hype Show and would like extend his apology directly to MIL MASCARAS, RIKIDOZAN and their handlers. He wants a good, clean, fair, epic-level main event to determine everlasting wrestling glory. So whattaya say?
Interrupted by Kanye West's "Diamonds From Sierra Leone. Enter BOBBY "the BRAIN" HEENAN with "NATURE BOY" BUDDY ROGERS and WADE BARRETT:
The Diamond Dynasty!!!
"NATURE BOY" BUDDY ROGERS: You know the old saying. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder for somebody new".
Says Cena is old news, everybody wants to see and hear from the Diamond Dynasty - and who they've chosen to be initiated into their illustrious ranks. Wade Barrett and Cena share death glares, while the Brain cackles sarcastically in the background. Tension mounts as the 3 members of the Diamond Dynasty surround the Franchise. But all is saved when Cena retains possession of the mic. Says the Chain Gang runs deeper, y'all picked the wrong State to step in.
JOHN CENA: And I'm a savage in the booth - I'm on some movement shit, about to rally up the youth!!!
Introducing
EVAN BOURNE!!!
Crowd pop is deafening upon Air Bourne's arrival, Bobby Heenan has to cover his ears. Cena waves "bye bye!" to an irrate Nature Boy as referees and ring officials spring into position. Before you know it, the timekeeper is in place, Heenan and Barrett are ringside and Evan Bourne stands opposite the "Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers, still wearing his priceless feathered robe.
2) EVAN BOURNE versus "NATURE BOY" BUDDY ROGERS (w/ the Diamond Dynasty)
versus
Elaborate stalling process from the "Nature Boy", as it pertains to removing the robe and placing it safely with Heenan. Refuses to commit a few times just to frustrate Evan Bourne further. Finally, with great crowd approval, Evan Bourne peels the referee out from between them and takes it right to Buddy Rogers. Action picks up considerably, as the original Nature Boy bounces around the ring like a pin ball for Evan Bourne's futuristic offense. Spinning wheel kicks, Lionsaults and somersault planchas to the entire Diamond Dynasty abound. Eventually, as crowd anticipation mounts, Heenan distracts Bourne from a high-risk maneuver drawing the ire of the referee.
The referee sends HEENAN & BARRETT back to the dressing room!
Another minor stall scene, as the drama sinks in. Nature Boy animatedly argues with the ref in protest, while Evan Bourne catches his breath. He catches Buddy Rogers off guard with a missile dropkick and we're off into phase 2. Buddy Rogers counters a few moves and concentrates on grounding Bourne with a devastating array of leglocks and grapevines. The Nature Boy grinds Bourne out on the mat, clearly angling for a Figure 4 submission. But Bourne counters with a small package and the pace begins to pick up as Bourne gets his bearings. Corner dropkick! Standing moonsault! Diving double kneedrop to Roger's shoulders! Evan Bourne is dominating the match until Nature Boy has to beg off for mercy! He's got the ref all up in his grasp, pleading for a timeout.
When out of the crowd TED DIBIASE JR appears! He slides into the ring, unbeknownst to the ref, and clocks Evan Bourne with the Million Dollar Championship belt as soon as he turns around!!! Bourne is out! Ted Dibiase Jr retreats back into the obscurity of the wrestling audience, fixing his tie and smirking obnoxiously as Buddy Rogers swoops in for the kill, getting the Figure 4 submission victory.
Winner: "NATURE BOY" BUDDY ROGERS
3) The crowd is just settling down after that shocking run-in by "The Fortunate Son" TED DIBIASE JR, when "Twist" by Korn rips through the arena sound system. From one toxic shock to the next.
THE MESSIAH and LIZZY BORDEN have an extravagant entrance, complete with pyro, smoke machines and a long train of leather-bound sex slaves following demurely alongside them. Even in her wrestling gear, Lizzy Borden's sheer trashiness is overflowing. The Messiah throws his hands in the air for his universal set, minus one thumb.
Answering their call, a rugged wolves howl reverberates throughout the arena to a huge pop. Desmond Wolfe & Alexxis Navaeh make their entrance upon the ramp and the crowd is feverish for their arrival. There are dozens of signs in the crowd for them. When they get into the ring, Alexxis' ever present smile drops as she and Desmond face the Xtreme power couple. Lizzy just laughs and fixes her cleavage.
LIZZY BORDEN & THE MESSIAH
Versus
ALEXXIS NEVAEH w/ DESMOND WOLFE
The story here is one of sick depravity. ALEXXIS gamely offers to begin the match (completely huggable in her determination), as Lizzy Borden stares her down from across the ring. But instead of finally engaging the girl she's been tormenting, Lizzy instead throws her head back with a laugh and tags in MESSIAH. Crowd tone goes low with that tag; dread anticipation.
So of course this animates Desmond Wolfe (aka Nigel McGuinness) on the ring apron and HE gets the tag in. But just as quick as that, Lizzy has begged back into the ring and stands defiantly in the center of the ring - chest to chest with Wolfe. She wants to get hit. Desmond looks to the crowd for some kind of affirmation, and eats a welting slap to the face. We're off.
Heat segment in the beginning, with Lizzy raining successive dirty blows down upon Desmond while he remains hesistant to strike back. Ultimately his scientific acumen allows him to subdue the Queen of Xtreme in dramatic fashion, before making the big crowd-pleasing, hotly anticipated tag to young Alexxis Nevaeh - her first time in the match. Crowd is amped as Lizzy backs off but Alexxis shows no sympathy. Especially after photoshopped images of her engaging in degrading sexual acts emerged on the internet during the lead-up to this match (most likely from Borden's camp).
Guillotine drop!
DDT!
One-handed bulldog!
Front dropkick to THE MESSIAH (!!!) who makes his way into the ring - but is quickly disposed of by the combined might of Alexxis and Desmond. Crowd rejoices as the Xtreme Duo roll to the outside and regroup!
We finally settle in with the real match, as The Messiah dramatically makes his entrance to face Desmond Wolfe. The English shoot fighter clearly has the advantage in take-downs, ground control and match tempo - so Messiah relies on his dirty boxing and tries to turn the match into a slugfest. He quickly succeeds. Speed picks up considerably as they build to an aggressive crescendo - replete with a crushing array of suplexes and high-impact offense.
Shit breaks completely down when Lizzy's outside interference turns the tide of the match, resulting in a quick mid-ring cat fight and Messiah using the guardrails to his advantage outside the ring. The ref struggles with the two women while on the outside - to a growing crowd reaction - The Messiah brings steel chairs into play. Various creative spots ensue, each one garnering stiff "OOOOs" and "AHHHHs" from the audience. Culminates with a somersault plancha from top rope to a nest of steel chairs on the arena floor. Desmond Wolfe escapes the attempt, resulting in a major crash-n-burn of The Messiah. Match resumes mid-ring with Lizzy & Alexxis finally getting it on.
Ultimately Lizzy is no match for the now fiery Alexxis Nevaeh, and in the end a botched miscommunication within Team Xtreme results in a spine-folding lariat finale. Desmond Wolfe rotates The Messiah 360 in route to the crowd pleasing 3-count victory! Desmond and Alexxis celebrate in the ring!
Winners: DESMOND WOLFE & ALEXXIS NEVAEH
Left in the ring to wallow in their own mire, Lizzy and The Messiah come to a violent disagreement. They begin red-faced shouting back-n-forth, pushing & shoving. Refs try to get involved but it's too late -Messiah clocks Lizzy, and the two sickos start fighting! Crowd is going banannas, as more and more security enter the ring to prevent a potential lawsuit.
SUDDENLY - a man appears on the entrance ramp. He is calling something forth from beyond the black curtain. Is he bringing more help?
NO!
4) It's THE GRAND WIZARD! Complete with obnoxious outfit, outrageous turban and sci-fi sunglasses. From backstage he calls forth his charge - the Madman from the Sudan,
the Shiek ABDULLAH the BUTCHER!!!
Absolute MADNESS as the Shiek ABDULLAH the BUTCHER cuts a violent path through the line of security guards to break his way into the ring, where he begins a shocking and unprovoked assault upon The Messiah AND Lizzy Borden!
Headbutts!
Throat thrusts!
Forks, and a steel spike!
The Messiah is gruesomely savaged! Climaxes with a brutal Sudanese Meat Cleaver in the center of the ring to Lizzy Borden! Crowd level breaks new decibels.
The Grand Wizard finally enters the ring (microphone in hand), soaking in the crowd shock and outrage and chuckling to himself. Abdullah the Butcher stands transfixed in the center of the ring, blood stained and panting. TGF takes center stage.
Formally introduces himself to the BCCW audience. He is the single greatest mind and talker in pro wrestling history. He has an intellect - an almost "mad genius" quality - that allowed him to become pro wrestling's diabolical leader of champions- the most successful manager of his day - and an inspiration for all future managers in wrestling, from James Cornette to Paul Heyman. He's here in BCCW today with his guy The Butcher for one reason: usurpation. They're taking over.
But of course, in the spectrum of pro wrestling space and time, The Grand Wizard has not come alone. He speaks of a "Trinity of Terror" that is coming to BCCW to stake their claim of wrestling supremacy. The godfathers of the industry itself; the lifesblood through which none else can exist. Beware and be forewarned - they're here to run the game. Top to bottom, nobody throws a wristlock without TGF getting paid.
THE GRAND WIZARD: I should not only be Manager of the Year, but I should also be the Manager of the Generation!
Cut to commercial.
JOHN CENA defends his WWE title TONIGHT in an International 3-Way Dance.
5) Back in the arena, a familiar 50's guitar riff interrupts the show. Could it be? Yes it is!
Introducing
THE HONKY TONK MAN!!!
HONKY TONK MAN (gyrating and patting his hair) Thank you for your support. I wish I was doing the broadcast. MSD has it all to himself and his cronies, i.e. Lawler, Cornette, Doc Hendrix, and so on. I think I can bring more than just one-liners that Lawler has been repeating for the last three years. If you go back to some of the shows I did commentary on you will see that I brought energy and excitement to a dull broadcast team. You will see that Ross and Lawler stepped it up a notch when I hit the airwaves. I really could care less about a manager's role; it is not my cup of tea.
Honky knows what all the BCCW fans want - they want to hear the Honky Tonk Man sing! (big boos) Speaking into the hands-free mic allows Honky to tune his guitar up in anticipation of his hit single "Cool, Cocky & Bad". The crowd jeers raise to deafening levels.
Honky mad! Y'all don't deserve to hear the Honky Tonk Man sing! The Honky Tonk Man was the greatest Intercontinental champion of ALL TIME! Everybody in BCCW wanna claim a championship pedigree, the Honky Tonk Man held that belt longer than anybody! Matter of fact, Honky Tonk Man here tonight. Anybody that wanna shake-rattle-n-roll, line 'em up - cuz Honky'll knock 'em down. Open challenge to anyone in the back!
Cue “Sell Out” by Reel Big Fish.
That same nondescript jobber parts the black curtains onto the BCCW entrance ramp. He takes an awkward moment to bask in the magnitude of the event. The same jobber that got pinned by Evan Bourne in Brockton and trounced by the Diamond Dynasty in Atlanta! Is this some kind of joke? Perpetuated by the Honky Tonk Man, perhaps? Who IS this kid?
RYAN DANGERFIELD: I'm known by many names; The White Flash is the most common one, but I've also been announced as the 'working-class weekend warrior', the 'ivory tower', the 'hero of the Flash Mob' and 'everyone's favorite EPW wrestler named Ryan Dangerfield'. Oh, given name? Ryan Dangerfield. Yeah.
Honky sizes him up and quickly changes his tune. He's gonna play the White Flash a little Rhythm-n-Blues. With an obnoxiously exaggerated kindness, and the tone you would speak with to a 3 year old or a special needs patient, Honky Tonk Man patronizes the boy further.
HONKY TONK MAN: It takes all kinds to make a good wrestling show, but the younger guys by mixing in with the vets can learn how to carry the torch.
RYAN DANGERFIELD: I trained for 2 years before debuting, and I've been wrestling for a year since. Prior to that I was a kickboxer and freestyle MMA fighter for 5 years.
HONKY TONK MAN: Complete training is very difficult, most of the guys training were never complete in all the skills, so it is hard to define ideal, what moves works for some guys will not work for others. It is something that can be acquired over time.
RYAN DANGERFIELD: I Needed a new thrill and have a thirst for competition, so it was the natural choice. Key motives are to entertain the fans, catch some air and bring rock'n'roll to the kids! (thumbs up to the crowd, followed by a cheap pop. Honky's faux-jovial expression darkens).
HONKY TONK MAN: This is something that comes easy for me.
Honky graciously "accepts" the match. But as soon as Ryan Dangerfield is being fleeced by the referee, Honky is creeping on him from behind with the guitar cocked and raised. Crowd tries to warn the poor boy to no avail... but just before he can strike...
"NATURAL BORN KILLAZ" by Dr Dre & Ice Cube!
Enter NEW JACK!!!
Armed with a trash barrel full of plunder, NEW JACK immediately goes on the offense - much to Honky's chagrin (but the crowd's utter delight). He's gonna show the Honky Tonk Man what it feels like to sing the blues!
Exploding guitar shot to Honky's head!
Suddenly in a flash, Ryan Dangerfield soars into the scene with a top-rope Warriorz Way to the downed Honky Tonk Man!
1!
2!
3! (???)
Winner: RYAN "WHITE FLASH" DANGERFIELD (???)
Was that even an official match? But before the kid can throw his hands up in celebration, he is seized by the violently explosive New Jack. Uh oh. Things are about to get really ugly for the young Aussie.
Kendo stick!
Hockey stick!
Staple gun!
187!!! (Top rope flying elbow smash with a steel chair to his unconscious, bloody opponent)
Dangerfield is certifiably murdered; another justified homicide. New Jack soaks in the cheers from the blood-crazed Slaughtahouse. Security surrounds the triumphant New Jack, as he stands foot upon chest of his fallen adversary. Suddenly, one of the "security guards" clobbers New Jack from behind a crutch! What the hell!?!?
That's no security guard! It's...
SICK VIC GRIMES!!!
6) NEW JACK versus SICK VIC GRIMES (impromptu BCCW Death Match - no fall to a finish)
Vic Grimes seizes the opportunity, and gets hardcore with stiff weapon and chair shots. He even uses a wireless keyboard and an Apple MacBook Pro that New Jack had brought in his trash barrel. But Vic Grimes has his own tool set, and he doesn't hesitate to use it on New Jack in a terrifying and gruesome assault.
Scalpel!
Cheese grater!
Pizza cutter!
Blood flows freely as Vic Grimes tries to end New Jack's life. When the Original Gangsta of pro wrestling realizes his attacker's identity, adrenaline kicks in and the fight for survival begins. The fight goes into the stands, with fans offering up such things as frying pans and beer bottles to be used as weapons. Major spots in the concession stand area, in a tip of the cap to Tupelo. After a few more outrageous weapon shots and table spots, Vic Grimes goes for the dramatic kill - he douses a large concession table with gasoline and sets it ablaze!!! But New Jack finds a broken piece of plywood with nails and uses it with homicidal intent. After a few wicked, flesh-tearing shots, Vic Grimes tries to flee by climbing into the crows nest of the arena. New Jack quickly gives chase. Meanwhile, the table continues to burn, sending dangerous black plumes of smoke high into the arena skylights.
The two blood-soaked hardcore maniacs battle high above the arena, to the roar of the crowd. To the surprise of no one (but the anticipation of everybody), Vicious Vic Grimes take the 30-foot fall off the scaffold through the burning table to the concrete floor! Holy s***! Holy s***! New Jack stands alone, pounding his chest with animalistic fervor.
Winner: NEW JACK
We take a break from that hair-raising drama by going backstage, where RUCKUS & SABIAN (the BLK Mobb) are prepping for their match:
SABIAN: I'm from Philadelphia. I've been wrestling since February 2000, mainly on the East Coast, but I've wrestled down South, in the Midwest, overseas... I would say that I'm one of the most underrated wresters currently on the Indy scene.
RUCKUS: I started off in high school wrestling, collegiate style. Then from there I just fucked around in the backyard with some friends. Then I went to wrestling school, got trained, and started April 18th, 1999. Since then I started with CZW in the summer of 2000. Then it went on from there.
SABIAN: I can adapt to any wrestling style. I know how to keep myself fresh and not become stale like so many other wrestlers out there. A lot of them being the guys that some of these fans seem to praise so much. I know how to entertain and give the people their money's worth.
RUCKUS: If you look at it right now, look at any typical match. That's all spots. Look at the stuff on Monday nights and it's just punching and kicking. No one wants to see that. My matches, I'd compare them to an old kung fu movie. You see a lot of different stuff in my matches. If a person thinks I'm too spotty then they don't have to watch me, you know? Judo, Tae Kwon Do, and kickboxing. I didn't do any gymnastics. I'm self-taught in that.
SABIAN: We're here in BCCW because there's way too many horrible Indies out there. A lot of the fans are spoiled and also think that they know it all and think that they can do what the wrestlers do better than the wrestlers do it. People think that matches are all about Flips or so called "Strong Style" with all these unnecessary head drops, reckless strikes, stupid moves and what not. That's not what it's all about! The sad thing is, I don't see any of that changing anytime soon though.
RUCKUS: I'm not really feeling that scene. I mean I don't know MSD so I can't say anything. Messiah's from XPW. So obviously, I have heard some things. But I haven't seen some of their stuff as of late. They're trying to do what they're trying to do, you know?
SABIAN: The Rock-N-Roll Express? I don't know much about them, I'm sure they're both good wrestlers. I do know that they both better be ready for Killadelphia's finest and better be ready to step there game up because they are going to be in there with a beast. BCCW isn't going to be the same after Blk Jeez comes through and tears it down.
RUCKUS: Get ready for something unbelievable. That's all I can say. Get ready for something you won't see anywhere else on that card. Something crazy.
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